A Second Chance
by wolf with panther eyes
Summary: Graystripe is left to confront unwanted memories when Millie tells him she's pregnant. One-shot.


"Good catch!" I purred, resting my tail on Millie's flank as she placed the plump sparrow on the ground.

Millie beamed, her blue eyes wide with pride. "Thanks, Graystripe!" she replied. She glanced down at the lifeless bird. "That's one thing I will miss, though..."

My heart skipped a beat. "One thing you'll miss?" I echoed, suddenly filled with worry. "Millie, are you going back to your Twolegs?"

Millie flicked my nose with her tail. "You've got to stop thinking that," she meowed sternly. "My home is here now... in ThunderClan, with you."

Relief flooded through me. "But then... what are you talking about?"

Millie hesitated, scuffing at the ground with a forepaw. "Graystripe..." she began. "I'm... I'm going to have your kits." She glanced up at me, her eyes meeting mine.

I froze; my tail dropped to the ground with a thump. I sat down, closing my eyes. Millie? Millie was... pregnant?

_"Graystripe, I've got some wonderful news for you... can you guess what it is?"_

_"C'mon Silverstream, you know I'm a rubbish guesser."_

_A light laugh... those beautiful green eyes..._

_"I just found out this morning - I'm having your kits!"_

"Graystripe?" Millie's worried voice rang in my ears. "Graystripe, are you okay?"

I flattened my ears, trying desperately to drive away the memories that threatened to drown me.

_"Are you insane?"_

_"But... but Fireheart! These kits will bring us together forever!"_

"I... I'd, err... I'm going back to the camp," I heard Millie say uncertainly. Her fading pawsteps told me that she'd left, pawsteps that rang through the memories.

This couldn't be true. It couldn't! I loved Millie fiercely, of course I did, but... kits were something else entirely. Kits could mean the difference between life and death.

_"I'm losing her!"  
_

_"No, Silverstream! Don't leave me!"_

_"Take care of our kits, Graystripe... I love you..."_

_"Silverstream!"_

It was my fault that Silverstream died. If she hadn't become pregnant with my kits, she wouldn't have had such a difficult... such a fatal birth.

I unsheathed my claws, digging them into the soil. If I let go, the memories would drown me completely.

What if Millie died too? What if, once more, I couldn't save her? What if I couldn't save her, just like I couldn't save Silverstream...

But... I may have lost Silverstream, but as she died she blessed me with two others to love. Our kits. Feathertail and Stormfur. And Feathertail was so much like her mother... the same glossy sheen in her silver-striped fur, the same caring light in her clear blue eyes...

And so, because she was so dear to me, StarClan took her. Like they always do.

_"Where's Feathertail?"_

_"Graystripe... Feathertail's dead. She died on the journey home."_

_That same feeling that Silverstream's death brought... that choking, helpless feeling..._

All I had left was Stormfur. Stormfur, who for all his strength, couldn't even save his own sister from her destiny. Stormfur, who looked as much like me as my reflection in the lake.

But then... then I met Millie. There was just something about her... her silver tabby fur she may have shared with Silverstream, but Millie's fur held none of Silverstream's glossiness of length. Instead her fur was short, and soft rather than silky. I liked her from the first - she was the only friend I made at Twoleg place.

She was the one who persuaded me to come back to ThunderClan... and the one who, despite knowing nothing of life in the wild, accompanyed me on the journey back.

With Silverstream, it was love at first sight.

With Millie, it was a gentle realisation.

I love Millie so much. I don't know what I'd do without her. But if I lose her, just like I lost Silverstream...

"Graystripe?"

Not a memory this time, a real voice. Slowly, I opened my eyes and focused on the cat in front of me. "Stormfur?"

"Millie just told me the news." Stormfur sat down opposite me, his tone neutral. "Congratulations."

"For what?" I mewed bitterly, staring between my paws. I was so choked up in my thoughts that I couldn't help from adding "If it happens again... if she dies..."

"She won't die," Stormfur responded, knowing instantly what I meant. "Millie's tough."

I scrunched up my eyes. "But Silverstream was tough too. And Feathertail."

"Look, Graystripe. Just because it happened once, it doens't mean that it'll happen again." Stormfur paused. "Think of this as... as a blessing. You lost your mate and your daughter. StarClan's given you another mate, and kits. They've given you another chance to live life."

I raised my head, surveying my son. "But... I don't know if I can cope."

Stormfur nudged me gently with his paw. "I know you can," he murmured. "Besides, it's different now. You and Millie are in the same Clan - Leafpool will be at your beck and call in an instant."

I stayed silent, and so Stormfur persisted. "This is what Feathertail would have wanted - and I may not have known my mother, but I'm sure Silverstream would have too."

That got my attention. I recalled my first mate and my daughter in my mind. Stormfur was right... they would have wanted me to be happy.

"Thank you, Stormfur," I meowed quietly.

"That's what sons are for. I'll see you back at camp," Stormfur replied, standing up. "Take your time."

I watched Stormfur's retreating back. _Thats what sons are for. _That single sentence... that single sentence washed away all the hurtful memories in one stroke. Just to have someone I loved so much, someone I'd raised since birth, someone who contained a part of me...

I may have lost Silverstream, and Feathertail. But I still had Stormfur. I still had my kit, my son.

* * *

There she lay, her silver fur glowing in the dying sun's rays. Her tongue worked swiftly, grooming her pelt into perfection. from where I stood, I could easily see the gentle bulge her stomach had obtained.

She heard my pawsteps as I came closer. I could see her head twirl towards me.

"Graystripe!" she meowed, her eyes wide. "Graystripe, I was so worried about you."

I lay down beside her, catching her tail in mine. "I'm sorry for how I acted," I mewed quietly. "I just want to say... I'm happy, Millie. For us. For our kits." I touched her belly with my nose as gently as possible.

_"Feel him kick, Graystripe? He's going to be a tough little warrior, that's for sure..."_

Millie wasn't far enough in her pregnancy for me to feel our kits move, but it didn't matter. The memory in my head now wasn't a sad one... it was a joyous, peaceful one.

_"These kits will bring us together forever."_

And they did, dear Silverstream. Because when I was looking at Stormfur I realised how proud I am to call him our son.

And someday, sometime in the future... Millie and I will be proud to call our kits kin.


End file.
